I’m so proud of her!
27th February 2013
Luke talks about how he feels about his wife Hayley becoming an egg donor.
When Hayley first mentioned she wanted to become an egg donor, I was quite surprised. She said it was always something she’d always wanted to do, and I was really proud of that, but I felt very short of information and wanted to know more.
At first I was concerned because I’d heard there was a link between ovarian stimulation and ovarian cancer. I lost my mother nearly eight years ago to this cancer so wanted to be reassured before giving my approval to Hayley. I talked to Alison and she went through the research, explaining that there wasn’t a proven link. I did my own research online as well, so I felt a lot happier about it afterwards, once I had some proper information.
There weren’t any changes in Hayley while she was going through the treatment but at first she was shy of doing the injections in front of me – she was very nervous as she has a phobia of needles. I went along to the second donation with her. The first one was just before we got married and I couldn’t get time off work. I waited for her and was there when she woke up.
We’ve told the children – the twins are too young to understand but our eldest is thirteen and is very proud and supportive of his mum.
I wanted to understand more about the DNA side of things. Men are different from women and quite proud – at first I felt like it was almost like my wife was having a child with another man. But I realised it’s not like that. Once I talked it through with Alison, I understood just how much the woman who gets pregnant and carries the baby puts into it. I like the way Altrui match the donors with the recipients, that a donor has same similarities like height, hair and skin colour, so the baby will fit in with their family.
To any man whose partner would like to donate, I’d say, talk it through.